I LOVED IT ALL

I LOVED IT ALL

In the end I didn't talk so well, had a strange aversion to the phone.
I spent my time taking stock, in my quiet room alone.
In the end I didn't walk so good, I would not leave home without a cane.
Some might say I just gave up, surrendering to relentless pain.

In the end I shuffled when I walked, awkward and a bit confused.
A little scattered in my focus, little more than a burnt out fuse.
But like some grateful orphan child the universe took in,
I wrapped my arms around the pain and claimed it as my friend.
And though I teetered on the edge and in the end would fall,
I swear until my final day I cherished life and I loved it all.

I loved it all, for it was life, the only life I'd ever known,
Into every nook and cranny, a brilliant light had shown.
Sometimes life got scary, sometimes life would reek.
In the end it was an effort to form my words and speak.
But I still had nimble fingers when the pills they did their thing.
And I could document my life in words and emails to my friends.
I could write my life in colors bright, and beg forgiveness for my sins.

There were times I was short-tempered and a tad loose with my tongue.
Not as kind and thoughtful as perhaps when I was young.
There were times when I was selfish, there were times I was headstrong.
I swear I had my moments when all I did seemed wrong.
But I danced if only in my dreams, in real life dance a fractured scheme.
And in my dreams my muscles soared, the milk of human kindness poured.
And at times my mind it wondered if I'd touched a single soul,
With my poems or with my paltry gifts, and that wondering almost ate me whole.

But I rose each day from my broken sleep or the rare nights sleep crept like a log,
And I found a sign from God's design that shone a light through time's dense fog.
Through the doubts and the down and outs that cast upon my soul this pall,
I cherished every ray of light and in my soul I loved them all.
I held my lover oh so tight and relished all the kindred souls.
I held the sun just like a weapon, in these trembling hands,
And vanquished night and saw the light as it tripped across these shifting sands.

In the end I saw the wonder in each vexing circumstance,
Each scattered random act of kindness, each new second chance.
Each new day of treasured bliss, each benefit of the doubt,
Each vestige of this pilgrimage, the loves, the hates, the ins, the outs.
And though hope teetered on the edge, not once did it tumble, not once did it fall.
In the end time was my sacred friend, I savored life and I loved it all.

-Bruce Potts
Revised Copyright 2015
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED